Note: Home Depot isn't paying me to write this stuff.
I am not big on chain stores but I like Home Depot. The smell of freshly cut wood while casually walking down their various aisles makes me feel that all life is good. I have often stopped at the painting section and gone through a paint selector book for 15 minutes while trying not to catch the eye of a salesperson. I don't want to talk. I just want to take it all in. And all those bolts and screws of various sizes and shapes in their own boxes neatly stacked in those huge shelves...Ah! I simply relish the tools section even though I don't know one end of a spanner from the other. Oh, they take care of the afore-mentioned bolts, do they? I have nary a plant in my house. I have been meaning to get some for a few years now but continue slacking off. Maybe I will make a procurement from Home Depot's garden section next time. Maybe for once, I won't simply stare at those little stands of dainty books that read How to Build a Deck or 16 easy Projects You Can Do Yourself For Less Than $100. Maybe I will...go through them. By the way, all those rows and rows of cement bags. I tell ya. Heaven!
Any visit to Home Depot naturally has to culminate in the lighting aisles, by far my favorite area there. When my folks did a major renovation of their house many years ago, my only suggestions included a chandelier for the dining room and twin light fixtures for the front door. I couldn't be bothered with making suggestions for the rest of the house. The chandelier came from a specialist lighting company in Dorchester, where my Mom and I picked it out. But the front door fixtures, looking very Victorian, came from Home Depot...and I picked them up all on my own!
I never really buy anything at Home Depot. Still I like to stop in occasionally and waddle around.
"Ripley: Why do you care about them? Annalee Call: Because I'm programmed to. Ripley: You're programmed to be an asshole? You're the "new model" asshole they're putting out?" Alien Resurrection, 20th Century Fox, 1997.
Monday, August 18, 2008
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